WHEN/THEN

Are you pining away for an exotic vacation, an exciting life, playing the WHEN _______ happens THEN I can _______.  My friend Jayne and I always have the very best conversations during dinner.  Jayne is so very well read, remembers everything and has taught psychology at the college level for a very long time.  We have delicious conversations and the food isn't bad either!  She recently joked (maybe) that she should start a WHEN/THEN support group.  Are you guilty of when/then thinking?  I certainly am.  She reminded me and several others that if you do not follow up on your dream you may see, for example, your idea for a book written by someone else.  I think she would have a LOT of takers on the when/then group.  It was a poignant reminder that each moment is significant...that once it passes...it is lost.  Do we/I really want to spend those precious moments in time playing the WHEN/THEN game? 

Two of the granddarlings recently spent the entire weekend with me...apart from a beautiful shiner and pure exhaustion...we had a lot of fun!  They remind me of those precious moments in time when a sprinkler system and a puddle of water rivals any grand resort...when the ordinary becomes extraordinary!

Children live in the moment.  Absolutely no WHEN/THEN thinking for them.  How about you? 

Flashback Friday or Normal is Good!

So after the great "boobie" scare of the last few weeks...it is good to be back to normal...almost! During the dark of the night, the very worst scenario would lodge into my brain and stay there...if nothing else the "scare" made me appreciate my life...the people I hold near and dear.
Please check the girls regularly and get a mammogram!

So...my grandson has been registered for kindergarten and I am not really sure where the time went...I am sharing the photos whereby little one still has a diaper and his shoes on...the cutest ones are of the bare cheeks running through the yard...that boy has always loved water and not wearing clothes...seems like he was born just five minutes ago...playing with the granddarlings brings me great joy!

A few other random thoughts:

I am wondering what the new neighbors with six kids, five dogs, two or three trucks and lots of tools will be building this weekend...last Saturday I woke up to hammering...there were two little buildings erected...I can't see much because for the first time in twenty years there is a privacy fence separating the yards...the house has been added to as well. I remember moving into our house and our backdoor neighbors passing brownies over the fence and how many backyard over the fence conversations we had...our children grew up together...I guess I won't be passing brownies through this fence.

Hopefully, I will be inspired to work on a few projects this weekend! I have started an art journal, a new dance/exercise class (more on that later...love it) apart from the millions of ideas floating through my brain right now I also have the very practical home and yard projects to consider. Actually...I probably should do more than consider those projects...I want some home grown fresh veggies!

Spring excites me...rebirth on so many levels...I am also reminded of my dear friend Dot Dot each time I see the daffodils in bloom...her favorite harbinger of Spring and the poem by Wordsworth!

I wandered lonely as a Cloud
That floats on high o'er Vales and Hills,
When all at once I saw a crowd
A host of dancing Daffodils;
Along the Lake, beneath the trees,
Ten thousand dancing in the breeze.

The waves beside them danced, but they
Outdid the sparkling waves in glee:
A poet could not but be gay
In such a laughing company:
I gazed -- and gazed --but little thought
What wealth the show to me had brought:

For oft when on my couch I lie
In vacant or in pensive mood,
They flash upon that inward eye
Which is the bliss of solitude,
And then my heart with pleasure fills,
And dances with the Daffodils

Can you believe most of our "Daffys" down South have almost bloomed out!
What will you do with your glorious Spring time?

Thursday Thoughts and Tirades

Did you ever have one of those weeks whereby EVERYTHING gets on your last nerve?
I am feeling a bit more like sour grapes than Loose Lemons. The glass is definitely feeling half empty! The remedy for this malady is to get off one's rear and do something nice for someone, focus the attention away from the negative and make serious effort to turn the "scratchy" mood around. Before I return to being the "epitome of sweetness and light" following are a few minor irritations to unload.

Yes, I still find cell phone usage obnoxious when you are: a) in the bathroom b) trying to park a huge SUV or any vehicle c) when you are arguing with someone d) when you are standing in front of my desk...go away, go anywhere, just get that darn phone away from me...headlines...woman snatches cell phone away from fellow shopper and tosses it into fish tank.

Yield means check and see if I am inches from your bumper before pulling into my lane, if I am on the interstate I have already moved to the left lane. Speaking of the left lane...this is the PASSING lane not the drive slow and look around lane.

You may have nowhere to go...conversations between two vehicles full of people whilst blocking the road, parking lot etc. is not cool it is inconsiderate.

Visiting the office and staying FOREVER is annoying no matter who you are...(i.e.
father-in-law's cronies, former employees, etc. particularly when you are complaining about the economy, the new president blah, blah...being racist or crude only gets on my nerves more!

Employees coming off of a job and standing around my desk and talking to each other, yelling up and down halls etc. is annoying. Go home or go outside. And stay out of my bathroom.

The opening in the wall between my office and father in law's office...I despise it and want it closed!!! with glass, wood, sound proofing, anything.

Honey, if you change the channel in the middle of Top Chef I am going to be irritated...I would not do this to you.

Okay, I think I am better.

On to a more positive note...I am so impressed with these guys...the weather has been damp, wet and nasty...however, this guy and his buddy are outside everyday, dancing and really trying to drum up business!




The guys working on my yard are doing a great job, it looks fabulous...wonder if they do windows?

The sun is peaking out from under the clouds.

DH washing and waxing my car and keeping it filled with gasoline!

Sometimes it is okay to unravel a knitting project when it is not working out. Often it is the process of knitting and not the progress that is important.

I love receiving cards in the honest to goodness old timey way through the postal service! (Thanks Meg. Tracie and Cookie)

Blogging has been an interesting adventure which I plan to continue...I enjoy the interaction between our "i-friends and families, I enjoy writing and I enjoy reading...it is like pen pals for grown ups!

I was able to use my Books A Million gift card to feed my habit

Phone calls from this charming, witty and oh so sweet fellow! I love it when he says, "Nonnee, you are my Best Friend"

Silence is Golden because it is so rare! So many need a constant thrum of noise and activity...not me I can sit in silence and gaze out the window indefinitely!!!

"Never worry about numbers. Help one person at a time, and always start with the person nearest you." - Mother Teresa

Happy Birthday Anna

To my sweet, loving, girly girl princess, Anna Banana...Happy 3rd Birthday - January 9th

I can hardly believe it has already been three years since I watched you "pop" into the world!

Thanks Meech and Kev for letting me be a part of the birth and the growing up years!!!

Box Full of Kisses

One of our first Christmas celebrations in Columbia, South Carolina. Dad was stationed at Fort Jackson Military Post and we lived in the apartments just off the post. This was Baby Boo, when you pulled out the pacifier, she boo hooed like crazy!!! I think my mom eventually gave her away. I loved that doll so much!

The smallest girl child would never smile for pictures. I often wondered what was going through her head. She probably wished her Mom would quit "taping" bows to her head! This was a time when they still allowed me to choose their clothes!

In my wanderings out and about I become so distressed and dismayed when parents are yelling and jerking their exhausted children around. With all the excitement and hullabaloo...children are out of their routine, they are tired, hungry and can be whiny...take them home parents...let them play and rest!!! How sad that they become a sounding board for angry, frustrated parents. I just want to scoop them up and take them home...eat popcorn, watch movies and trash the kitchen! My grandchildren frequently visit and the house is never the same... it takes hours to restore it back to "normal" but it is just stuff...the time spent with the kids is priceless.
My tree is more "decorator" style than homemade nowadays, however nothing on that tree means more to me than each child's delight as they look at it and maybe touch the ornaments. It is stuff...feelings are more important! So feel free to come on over and put your feet on the coffee table...provided you don't have on muddy boots! I came across a story similar to the one below several years ago and it sums up some of my feelings about "stuff"

A Box Full of Kisses

The story goes that some time ago, a man punished his 3-year-old daughter for wasting a roll of gold wrapping paper. Money was tight and he became infuriated when the child tried to decorate a box to put under the Christmas tree. Nevertheless, the little girl brought the gift to her father the next morning and said, "This is for you, Daddy." The man was embarrassed by his earlier overreaction, but his anger flared again when he found out the box was empty. He yelled at her, stating, "Don't you know, when you give someone a present, there is supposed to be something inside? The little girl looked up at him with tears in her eyes and cried, "Oh, Daddy, it's not empty at all. I blew kisses into the box. They're all for you, Daddy." The father was crushed. He put his arms around his little girl, and he begged for her forgiveness.

In a very real sense, each one of us, as humans beings, have been given a gold container filled with unconditional love and kisses... from our children, family members, friends, and God. There is simply no other possession, anyone could hold, more precious than this.

I Guess That's Why They Call It the Blues

Queen of procrastination that I am...Pippa over at her porch had a game of capturing "the blues" last week...I am finally posting my finds...it has also gotten the song "I Guess That's Why They Call It The Blues" by Elton John etched in my brain!

Seems like I can ALWAYS find a way to get the grandchildren into any project...I must confess these were not taken last week! (but...they capture blue)

Packed and ready to GO!!! Anyone still want to go on a road trip with me? I promise I'll use a map!

In the kitchen blues, a spot of herbal tea anyone? Or shall I cook something...hmmm...the recipe is here somewhere...

"Swiped" the lucky elephant from my Mom, she has "its" four brothers and sisters...I told her I would give it back after I took a picture and she said I could have her! Mom decided to decorate her bare tulip tree with a drawer full of Mardi Gras beads.

So, that's it for this past week's game of the blues! I guess that's why they call it the blues...friend that I am I did not put the song in the background of this post...because I am nice that way... anyone have any suggestions for getting it "unstuck" ?

Chocolate Milk, Flat Tires, Spiderwebs and Children

Roofing nails and my 4 door larger "grandma" car seek each other out as if magnetized or drawn by some force of nature. My intention was to load up the older, larger Ford and take contents to "Goodwill". As I round the car with the first of many bags, alas the front driver's side tire is flat to the rim flat! Inflate tire, get thee to nearest station, repair tire...work like there is no tomorrow, walk outside to find said tire flat yet again...repair again and since we are at the station anyway let's change the oil and "fill er up"...discussion with our favorite mechanic about possibly replacing all tires. (They look fine) Rush to pick up grandchildren from daycare before it closes! Feed grandchildren, play, rinse and repeat. Make pallet of down comforters and blankets on floor and prepare to get quiet for the evening and sleep. NOT!!! Watch same two movies, "Chicken Little, The Incredibles" finally put two wiggly children in bed with grandmother, one on each side...wake up every two hours for various reasons...

Look Nonnee, "I makin a spiderweb!" Note to self...it is entirely too funny so one can not really be angry that crochet thread is all over and entwined through everything. Such a creative little creature! The plan is to pick up the great grandma and spend time together. Pick up great grandma...grab some drive thru lunch...hey, Nonnee where's the chocolate milk? They were out of chocolate milk...note full blown meltdown until we reach home...leave the children with the great grandmother and make effort to go to grocery store...why oh why is the car swerving all over the road...YES...ANOTHER flat tire! This time the rear tire is flat to the rim flat! Call father in law because every other male is in North Carolina at a racetrack...exchange 2 seat Porsche for VW Beetle...still small with 2 doors, however we are back in business with a back seat. Note: refuse to fix tires and drive other car due to the fact that there are two more tires with the potential of having nails in them...

Rest of the day is spent playing, crying and mad dashes to the potty...change little girl...mop floors, rinse and repeat throughout the day...take great grandma home...

Starting to feel a wee bit exhausted and relax in chair, dozing lightly because younger daughter has arrived and is entertaining children...wake up to extremely loud, dancing turtle and little boy right in your face knocking over glass of diet coke which looks lovely running down the walls and all over the hardwood floors...mop, rinse, repeat! Daughter watches children so that "Nonnee" can rest...all three fall asleep on floor (down comforter pallet) daughter wakes and goes home...sleep on couch, stumble to bed for a few hours, four feet running down hallway with a cheerful, happy singsong GOOD MORNING! Attend church, eat lunch, read books and take naps...what's not to love about Sunday! Other grandparents are taking the wee ones Sunday night and Monday. Younger daughter stressing over job, needs to be "fluffed" and fed, (her husband is out of town as well) goes home...8:00 p.m. house is in shambles and all is quiet...

It will be several hours before husband arrives home...it is almost too quiet...restore home, relax on couch, reflect on amounts of spilled beverages, body fluids and sticky doorknobs...smile about spiderwebs that must be cut because the "webs" are so cleverly constructed...Life is Good, tiring sometimes but still very good...four sticky little hands on your face or around your neck...hand prints on the walls...gosh, deja vu...was it just yesterday that I was the Mom and this was an everyday event? Yes, my friends Life is Good!!! And grandchildren are even better!!!

Through the Eyes of a Child

This is what happens when you leave your camera within reach of a soon to be four year old!

Do you think we have a budding photographer on our hands? I am always amazed when I look at the world through the eyes of a child...have you ever gotten on your knees and crawled around...things sure look different from that angle! I am convinced we move into a state of ennui when we constantly do things the same way everyday or look at things with our "grown up" eyes. We often miss the subtle occurances happening all around us. My children frequently inspired me to reach new heights. My grandchildren give me the opportunity to see things anew again. Hunter and I were riding in the Boxster with the top down...He always says "put it down, Nonnee!" And away we go...car seats and seat belts, of course. If you are bored, lonely or sad...borrow some children (your friends will love you) and go for a walk , blow bubbles or color...many exciting adventures await you.

I SEE THE MOON AND THE MOON SEES ME!

My pitiful attempt at capturing the most glorious full moon. It was so beautiful last night. I attended our monthly book club meeting which is always, always a good time. A group of people who love to read, discussing, laughing and just having a great time! My grandchildren are learning very early to love books! Little Miss Anna attended book club last night. I rode with her in the backseat...on the way home we looked for the moon, she was soooo excited every time she spotted it. I remember reading Good Night Moon by Margaret Wise Brown to my children every night for what seemed like years. The words "I see the moon and the moon sees me" popped in my head and I was reciting parts of the book for Anna. Every time she would spot the moon she would say "I see the moon and the moon sees me". My daughter called me and asked if I would take some pictures from my house as I have such a clear view of the sky. She said that Anna was still looking for the moon and kept talking about it. I tried many attempts at stabilizing the camera (I need a tripod or a better camera) I finally retrieved a blanket from the garage and just sprawled out on the lawn. DH was in the garage working on a new airplane...sigh. I cannot begin to describe the loveliness of lying on the grass looking at the night sky. It reminded me of childhood drive-in movies and yard camping.

I have been "coming out" of my cocoon at a very alarming rate. The revelations, ideas and epiphanies that are swarming through my brain are astounding and exhilarating...stay tuned for this crazy journey! I feel like I have been asleep at the wheel and am waking up to a whole new world!!! What truly amazes me is my strong desire to be outdoors. My children and I spent a great deal of time outside when they were "small". As they got older and went their separate ways and a series of life events occurred I settled indoors and nested. Now it appears I am being kicked out of the nest by my own inner voice! I am excited to wake up in the morning to see how the new day will unfold! Yippee!!!!

FOURTH OF JULY

Tomorrow will be the fourth of July whereby our nation celebrates its independence from tyranny. We must all be thankful for the many blessings we share by living in the United States and having life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness readily available to us. I personally will have a long moment of silence to honor those who serve our country both past and present.

Dear Husband and I may spend the day at the Fogle Family Compound in Neeses, SC. There is a huge convergence of Fogles with singing, eating great food, water sports and much laughter. I still owe Uncle Bobby a couple laps around the pond. Just so you understand the depth of this promise...the pond is a full size, competition sized water skiing, swimming, fishing and boating sized pond!

We will enjoy a 4 day weekend. THANK YOU! I have lots of things to do around the house and I have tons of great books to peruse! YIPPEE!

We will celebrate Chloe's 4th birthday on the 4th. She shares her birthday with her other grandma, so Happy Birthday Chloe and Gayle!!!

Little Miss Firecracker, born on the 4th of July. Full of love, life, joy and laughter!!!


Happy Independence Day to you where ever you may be tomorrow! Have a Great One! Show some sparkle!!!

Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Ah, the age old question. Recently someone sent me a hilarious list of possible reasons "the chicken crossed the road". One indicated that the chicken needed a change. We all know that the other side of the road always looks better than the side on which we are currently standing. We cross over only to find that what we were looking for is not there, the view is just different! I remind myself over and over with a little help from my friends that I have everything I need right in this present moment and within myself. So many people are "unhappy". The key to happiness for me is really very simple. I have a Heavenly Father who loves me and I wish to live by the example shown by his Son, Jesus Christ. I adore my family and enjoy spending time with them. Most of the time, I like who I am!!! If I am having one of those "I don't like myself, pity party kind of days, I do something kind for someone. This immediately removes the focus off of what I am not liking at the time. My friend, Jayne introduced me to a book called "The Four Agreements" by Don Miguel Ruiz and I have found myself repeating those agreements over and over to myself and it really helps me stay focused on what is important! One of these days, I will be "blog" proficient and be able to put links in here correctly! I highly recommend reading "The Four Agreements". I do not tolerate boredom well, so I have little things I do to avoid it:

• I take exotic mini vacations in my mind. Anywhere in the tropics. Meditating on a mountain. Anywhere that gives my mind a momentary rest and change of pace.
• I take alternate routes when going places. I know I am driving the same route too often when I automatically go somewhere and it is not where I intended going!
• I listen to a huge variety of music
• Turn off the television. Too much television creates boredom, dissatisfaction and ennui!
• Learn something new!
• I love to read a wild selection of books. I am not hooked on one genre.
• Play!!! Bubbles are great. Fingerpaints and Playdoh are very therapeutic. Borrow a child if you feel silly doing it by yourself!
• Laugh. Laugh. And Laugh some more! There is humor in just about everything. Don't take yourself so seriously all the time.
• Be a tourist in your own town. I have been amazed seeing something with "fresh eyes"
• Try on clothes that you would not ordinarily wear.
• Clean and Organize. I love the satisfaction of organized closets and shelves.
• Cuddle with someone you Love!

If you are feeling the need to "cross to the other side" I suggest looking around and making a few changes on your side of the road. Sometimes a change of perspective is all that is needed to enhance your day to day existence! If you do cross the road with the chicken, remember we are over here cheering you on when you choose to come back!!! Just don't get stuck in the middle of the road.

Dear Dad

I have been pondering writing a letter to my dad for some time. Hayden wrote one on her blog to her father and inspired me to get on with it! Below is a stroll down memory lane...

This is one of our regular Sunday outings. Dad would take my brother and me to an old fashioned soda fountain and then on to the park and let Mom have a few hours to herself.

I was always Daddy's little girl no matter what my age at the time. He reminded me often.

Dad at Biltmore House and Gardens. Mom, Dad and baby Michelle spent the day here while I was working. My father adored being a grandfather and would put Michelle in his lap and read her the morning newspaper. I believe with all my heart he lived as long as he did because he adored being with her so much. She would go in the house and say "get up Opop." In honor of Father's Day and my Dad's birthday in July...

Dear Dad,

I think of you often with so much love and gratitude. I hope that I told you I love you enough and my actions expressed those feelings. As a parent I appreciate that you were an awesome Dad. You are the inspiration for the better choices that I have made in my life. I wished I had listened to you about computers because you sure nailed that one!!! You were the steadfast, calm and reasonable part of my childhood. A perfect foil to the "craziness" that was Mom. I remember how hard it was for you to punish us. I realize now that it was acutely painful for you, however, whatever form that punishment took, you knew that it must be meted out. I hated disappointing you. I remember thinking Mom's beating with the wooden spoon and yelling was over and done with very quickly. You would talk and talk and talk and look so sad. I learned honesty and responsibility for my actions due to some of your "punishments." Particularly the time I tried to blame Jimmy for something that was my fault. You embraced King Solomon's wisdom in dealing with that situation by allowing the responsible party to step up. I loved you and I adored Jimmy and I could not bear the responsibility of my little brother suffering the punishment you had in mind for both of us until somebody confessed and made it right. I have never forgotten that experience. Thanks for being home every night to sit down with the family to have dinner and talk about the day. We generally tackled you the minute you walked in the door and you wrestled, tickled and tossed us around until dinner was ready never complaining that you were tired. You were there without fail unless the once in awhile that you had bivouac or the tours to Vietnam that took you away. You sacrificed much for your country and family. Many of the anti-war establishment did not realize what you did for your country and the toll it took on your health. We had a few awkward years when I discovered that you were not my biological father. I pulled away a little out of anger and lack of understanding. I know that you and mom thought it was in my best interest. It never occurred to you guys that it would come up when I needed a birth certificate to get my driver's license and I could read German! You told me that I was extra special because you chose me. I thank you for loving me so very much. There were times when I thought Mom was really cold and I think you made up for that. You would be happy to know that she and I have sorted our differences and we actually enjoy one another's company. She did tell me the circumstances of my conception and possible termination and that once she saw me she was glad that she decided to keep me. After all these years, I understood her anger and why I would be a constant reminder of that night when she was powerless. You were the perfect mate for her. You calmed her fears and made her feel secure. You often worked two jobs after you retired from the Army to make sure that all our needs were met. Thank you for always putting us first above anything else. I often look at pictures and get so amused at your outfits! I now know you did that to annoy Mom. She has had a couple of boyfriends but has never re-married, she always says she would never find another man as good as you. I think she regrets not telling you more often. Thank you for helping my husband and I get a good start by loaning him the money to start his own business. He is still very successful at that endeavor. We are not married anymore, I don't know if he remembers everything you did for us, but I do and I will always be grateful for the faith you had in us. I am so sorry you had to suffer so badly with your health. I remember spending many times at the hospital, year after year. I know this truly frustrated you. To be such a visionary and to not have the strength to make those dreams happen. I can't see an episode of M*A*S*H and not think of you and the evenings we spent eating popcorn and watching television together, just you and I. When I am troubled I am sure you hear me because I still talk to you. Christmas eve is still difficult for me even after 25 years. There are things that come up and I tell my friends, "you know sometimes a girl just needs her dad." I can't remember your faults, I know you weren't perfect but you were as close as it gets. I realize not all fathers are like you and I was extremely fortunate that you "picked" me! Thank you so much for everything you meant to me and to the other lives you touched. Happy Father's Day and I Love You, Always!!!

P.S. I also remember all of your really corny jokes and songs!

Yard Shenanigans

Coming out of the fog of pain that was in my brain! Flowers and herbs were planted, children were enchanted. Finally, feeling sociable after a week of intense headaches. A delightful weekend was spent with family. On Saturday morning we attended a swap and social. Continetal breakfast was served and everyone brought stuff to trade. I mostly brought stuff to send to a new home. I did find some fabric to make a curtain for the hallway door and some craft stuff to add to my burgeoning supply. I am unable or unwilling to part with anything remotely crafty or artsy! One never knows when inspiration will strike and supplies must be on hand. I was able to start the herb garden. I am so excited. Please Grow!!! Sunday afternoon was spent admiring the flowers and herbs. The wee darlings decided they needed to rake and dig a bit. Everyone also thought it would be a great idea to roll down the sloping yard. Of course I landed in the swamp at the bottom, dizzy as heck. Yoga was demonstrated and practiced. Children played and romped and jumped as children are wont to do, reminding the "grown ups" of the sheer joy of sunshine, laughter and playing really hard! Oldest daughter said she was being artsy fartsy with her photographs! I think the pictures are some of my favorites to date. I am once again reminded to live every moment to the fullest and that LIFE IS SO GOOD!!!